View Full Version : Civil War soldier jokes

Emmanuel Dabney
03-04-2007, 03:30 PM
In looking for something totally unrelated I found this auction site which has the diary of Private Henry Weaver, Co. A, 105th PA and must be the Henry G. Weaver who went in as a private and was mustered out as a private or at least these people make no mention of this Henry Weaver (author of the diary) being a Corporal (see Civl War Soldiers and Sailors System as there is a Henry and Henry G. Weaver).

Nevertheless the jokes, dry as they are, are rather interesting and maybe you can use them at your next event:

“…Why is a kiss like a rumor? Because it goes from mouth to
mouth…Why is a four quart jug like a ladies side saddle? Because it
holds a gal on….What tune is it that ladies never call for? Why the

see: http://www.hcaauctions.com/PDF/2003_06.PDF (You will need Adobe Acrobat Reader to view this) for more of the auctions but in specific the snippets of Pvt. Weaver's diary that has been provided.

Trish Hasenmueller
03-04-2007, 09:17 PM
Thanks, Emanuel, for sharing that fellow's jokes, saved in his diary. They reminded me of a joke book entitled The Camp Jester, or Amusement for the Mess online with quite a few similar puns and jokes...some quite rude, I might add. It was published in Augusta, GA in 1864, so was intended for the southern army audience, I'm sure, but many of the jokes are usable.

Maybe some of you jokesters on the forum could use some of them.

Here's a link: http://docsouth.unc.edu/imls/jester/jester.html

Trish Hasenmueller

03-09-2007, 03:32 PM
i can't rember where I heard this one, but sounds just about right.

A soldier is running away from the battle when he meets a General, the General says "Soldier, why are you running?" the soldier replied "'because I can't D_ well fly!"

Gary of CA
03-12-2007, 01:06 AM
During the Mother of American Family Feuds (or the Late Great Unpleasantness between States), both North & South resorted to the draft to raise soldiers for their armies. We have an anecdocte of a married man (and you can tell he's married):

Commissioner: "What have you to say?"
Applicant: "I'm forty-eight years old."
"Where were you born?"
"Don't know."
"How old were you when you came to this country?"
"Don't know."
"How do you know you are forty-eight years old?"
"I know it. I'm sure of it."
The Commissioner, after various ineffectual trials to make the application show what reasons he had for his belief, now asks, "Are you married?"
(Applicant very sulky, but no answer.)
Commissioner: "I asked you if you are married. Did you hear?"
Applicant: "I don't wish to be insulted."
"No one wants to insult you. Are you married?"
Applicant in a very loud voice, "Of course I am!"